Friday, 11 July 2014

Lost

If you are wondering why I  wrote in English, its because I'm blogging with my office's computer. And I have started my night desk for 2 weeks now. This is how I feel:

I'm feeling lost. 
Not because of night desk alone, but in general my job. 

I got a little emotional when we (me and the rest of the night desker)  got cheated by the higher rank. They have always said but never any action, never any confirmation. We are young, we are not married, we are very flexi with any decision. And they exploit us of our rights, made use of us. We were really upset with their attitude, the way they handle stuff. 

A colleague told me he rejected his job offer because we got to claim extra money. Now that they refuses our rights just because he didnt check the proper paperwork, we might not get what we deserves. We worked as hard as they are, worked even longer hours than they. They even took our public holiday away. But in return we got sarcasm and ignorance. 

While I was standing by the window one night overlooking the pretty KL skyline from 29th floor, with classic oldies played in the background, this hush of emotion attacked me. I was feeling kind of emo, something was upsetting me. It was a mixed feelings of anger and anxious, I have no idea what am I doing, where lies my future. It got me thinking. Thinking of my job, of my future, of me. I know for sure, this job is not my forte. I will leave. So I set a dateline, I set a  life draft and hopefully when times come, I will find my way. 

Its a emo kinda night. 
:/


Monday, 30 June 2014

Sharing the love

I've wanting to write about this for a while but never had the mood to do so. 

As we step into the second half of the year, I find myself thinking of the resolution I made earlier this year. I didn't wrote down my resolution this year as I want to change as time goes by. I didn't want to constraint myself. One resolution in particular stand out as it involve other people and not only changes in myself. 

Last year when I was having a very difficult time financially, I found myself at a verge of being broke. I have never ask for any extra money that period of the time from my parents because I know they were in a worst position than I was, at least I did have my ptptn money with me. 

I blog about it in my personal blog which was deleted a while ago. Two friends, read it and approach me offering me money. Both of them are not well off, nor were they making a lot of money at that time. But both of them offer to borrow me money and pay them back later. I rejected as I knew I was able to live by without starving but with a very minimum amount of money. 

That very action explains my resolution actually. Often, we forgets the kindness of our friends, how they were willing to sacrifice a little part of them for us. 

For the whole year of 2014, I wanted to repay my friends who treated me like a friend. I wanted to be a little more caring. And that was why I started my little project of mine of buying them a meal. A whole lot of them started questioning my intention at first, some easily accepted my reason, some shrug it off like I was crazy. But in the end, I did pay the bill. 

So far, I have succeed buying 7 friends a meal. The food itself had no meaning, the gathering behind that meal is. My condition of my project is that it must be only 2 person so we had time to talk and catch up. I like the idea of sharing thought together and just talk. 

6 months left, if you want to catch a meal with me, please don't hesitate to call me. I would be more than happy to belanja you. 

PS: Please do not ask me out on month end. Haha 

Wednesday, 25 June 2014

歌

请按下面的youtube听
 一边读一边听


也不知道从何时开始
习惯了 做什么事 都有背景音乐

想当年 电脑还没fomat前
电脑里有上千,可能还上万首歌
不同年代 不同语言 不同类型
可是听了 特别舒服

可能 一个人太久了
所以 有时候也盼望有声音陪我

以前读书时
考试前一天读书还是会开歌读
收拾房间 打扫房间 
发呆 无聊 烦恼 伤心 愤怒 开心 兴奋
也会听歌 

毕业以后 好久没有像今晚一样
啥也不做 就听着歌 

烦恼好像不见了
疲劳也消失了

:D

Sunday, 8 June 2014

旅行



喜欢旅行
喜欢Explore
喜欢看见不一样的东西 
喜欢尝试不一样的事情
喜欢在陌生的地方做陌生的事情遇见陌生的人

身边有许多朋友同事一辈子没去哪里旅行过
而我很幸运地 虽然没去过很多地方 
可是也去了不少地方

也爱上了旅行

隔壁的同事告诉我
他去旅行一定跟团 因为一切很陌生
很多人很害怕这种不安感
而我 却很喜欢那种感觉

老板很爱告诉我们
这世界很大
不只是在马来西亚而已
叫我们放远点看

其实这世界真的很大

就算我这辈子去不了环游世界
也想尽力努力看看这世界

朋友们
走吧!
一起旅行去!

 Bangkok - Checked :D

Saturday, 17 May 2014

憎恨

同事跟我说了一件让她十分气的事情
说有位同事自己做错的事赖在我身上
那位同事很帮我打不平
因为公司所有人都知道是他的错
好吃懒做 大男人 不认错 
他却好像什么事都没有一般

我已练到不再在意这些事了

从前的我 会很讨厌他
甚至会boycott他
不跟他说话 把他当隐形人

从前我讨厌的人真的很多
大学最后一年花了很长的时间在房间在思考 
思考人生
哈哈
也想通了许多事

发现 讨厌别人真的对自己没好处
在别人背后说别人坏话也很多余 

从前在大学惹了一个人 也惹了一堆人
很不喜欢她 
开始是不喜欢她做事的态度 然后到她的性格 再来品行
而她也察觉了 也在别人前说我的坏话
最后传到我耳里 
我当然生气也伤心
可是 到最后想想 自己也有错
我不能幼稚的用一样的方式对付
所以我选择了沉默

有个mutual friend知道了以后
问我为什么不回复?
因她是公开式的让大家知道
我大可以anoymously回应
当然我没有
我只是觉得没必要

很久以后 在一个聚会遇到她
她还是没改变
还说一句让我十分震惊的话 
她说
“好久没有讲别人坏话了 感觉真好”
顿时,自己觉得
 当初的决定是对的 
远离 才会让我拥有正能量


从前的我很寡言
如果遇到什么不愉快的
我不会告诉那个人 
现在 不再那么傻了
那位同事说我很勇敢 
只因为我很坦白的告诉那位很懒的同事
他的错 他的懒惰 他的态度
 他只是一笑而过 
我知道他是对我有偏见了
可是 我不后悔 因为至少我让他知道了

我不想再犯同一个错
沉默带来的误会 
误会带来的憎恨
憎恨带来的不悦 
 这很不健康

我选择活得自在一点

真心希望他能反省
Ps:  大男人的男人真的不能要

 

Friday, 2 May 2014

母亲

朋友们都知道我是个不孝女 
我也承认
不爱回家 
爱顶嘴
不孝顺 
常说她偏心
总批评她 

可是我不允许 
别人对她不好 

女人啊
一辈子给了老公 
而最后得到的是什么 
平时对她也不好了 
不理不睬 不关心 不心疼 

生病了 
不但没有安慰的话 
粥也不煮给她
晚餐解决了自己的 就算 
把厨房弄得乱七八糟
Expect 她帮他收拾 
家里没水了 也不去煲水 

我每次都说她是个傻女人 
她总是默默的看着我 不回答
因为她也知道 她是 

一辈子 为了他
辛苦了 一辈子 
所有 辛苦事自己杠
 到底为了什么 

总不 让我对她好 
请她吃饭 说害怕他没饭吃
买东西给她 总不可奈何收下 

母亲节要到了

给予 
那位每天把孩子老公摆第一
那位每天担心我没吃饭
那位每天担心我不够钱
那位总把我养肥
那位总是很听话帮我办大小事
那位每天被我骂又不生气
 那位比自己更心疼自己 
的
Mama Tham

最真诚的
母亲节快乐 
Happy Mother's Day!
<3


你永远是最伟大的 
 

Saturday, 5 April 2014

Helllooooo

有多久没在这乱画了
有多久没有用电脑上网了

哈咯 

电终于出院了
健康的回来了 

这段期间 
有许多 想分享 
却因电脑故障而停止了 

不知道 我这份热情会持续多久 
可是 我就尽量吧 

停笔太久 
 有点生锈了 

更新一下自己近况吧
工作  还好
生活 不错 
金钱 还可以
感情 零

就这样 
 :)